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Regrets from the Mother of the Bride


Regrets from the Mother of the Bride

Regrets… Sigh!…We all have them…They are the “What If’s”…or the; “Woulda, Shoulda, Coulda.

Regrets…We all have them, but would you want to have them on your wedding day, an important day of your life. Whether you are a mother, sister, grandmother, or aunt you wouldn’t want that for your bride. You want the best for your family so why would you want them to go forth with a wedding without having the best plans possible. A wedding is a very planned and chaotic day. You want to help the bride and groom have the best day possible. A way to ensure this happens is reflecting on past lapses in judgment or ill-planned ideas. The day of the wedding day you get one chance to perfect the day. There are many days, weeks, months, and possibly even years to plan the day out, from the centerpieces to the pictures. When that day comes, you have all but lost your mind or least a good part of it. A way to ensure that your bride has the best day, you want to make sure every "I" is dotted and every "T" is crossed. We can look at past brides - now the mothers -  to decide what is the best way to proceed. Brides might not think there was anything wrong with their perfect day, but the people around them can make sure that the couples don’t have to worry about a thing. When trying to think of the best way to move forward with some great advice,  we need to look at the Mothers of the Brides. They must figure out the approach and a way to make their daughters have the best day of their life. Here are a few regrets from mothers I personally know that might help to ease your stressful day.

While recently photographing a wedding and visiting with the Mother of the Bride, she opened with how she wished she had done some things differently. You know we have all been there. I knew that if she was feeling that way, there were other mothers that shared the same view.

Communication is the key

For anything to run smoothly you need communication. That is ever more important in a large scale event such as a wedding. When you have so many moving parts like the bridal party, vendors and even family members, it's vital that you talk. With so many options from email, Skype, and Google Hangouts, there is no reason for a lack of communication. Darn, even a meeting over coffee will do the trick to get everyone back on track.  A group email to all the vendors is a great way to keep everyone informed of what each should expect and how the day will flow. A mother of the bride said, “I wished she had sent an email to all the family to hang around for pictures after the wedding”.  In all the chaos,  after the lucky couple skipping down the aisle, she forgot to mention that to a few close family members.  We missed them for the formals.

A Wedding Planner would have been helpful

The purpose of the wedding planner is to be a liaison between all the vendors and the bride/groom on their wedding day. Wedding planners can be hired for the duration of the engagement to help assist and plan along the way. They will have resources that the bride may not know about. If you have planned out your perfect wedding and don't want to stress on your big day and want to enjoy the fruits of your labor, a Day Coordinator is the perfect answer to help you enjoy your big day. A recent mother of the bride said, “A wedding planner would have been a good idea so I was not running from one place to another making sure the flower girl had her basket with flowers petals and chairs were where they needed to be". It comes down to, “You can pay with money or you can pay with time.” On the wedding day, your time is more valuable than money.

Make the time to enjoy the family

You have spent the better part of the last year or longer helping plan the wedding. Sometimes the time seems to drag along and you think the wedding day will never get here. The big day has arrived and before you know it, the reception is over and the bride & groom are leaving for their honeymoon. In a blink of an eye... its over! You had family flown in,  your little girl is gone, and you don’t remember a darn thing because you were making sure all the flowers were where they needed to be, the Unity candle and sand ceremony were all set up and ready to go. “I wished I had spent more time with family.” a mom told me. “I wished I had my hair and makeup done at the salon.” or “I wished I had hung around more while she was getting ready.”  They all have the same theme. Spent more time with family soaking in all the memories and visiting with family that had traveled across the miles for this special occasion.

Nobody likes regrets. The old adage “No Regrets” comes to mind. Do what you can to prevent them and learn from another’s mistakes. Get a strong line of communication going with all the vendors and let the family know to hang around for the formals after the wedding. Hire a professional wedding planner, even if it's just for the day. These will relieve some of your stress and help ensure you’re able to enjoy the wedding you have spent many hours helping plan and time with the family that grew with a simple "I Do."

If you would like to visit more don’t hesitate to contact me. I’d love to meet with you over a cup of coffee or a cupcake.